Yesterday was nice but kind of a waste. I guess most rainy days are. Truck Driver Burt came home way, way early. He cooked bacon so we could have bacon sandwiches for breakfast and lunch. We ordered The Vow and Underworld 4 on PPV. I really liked The Vow. It had me cooing the entire time. Plus, seeing Channing Tatum’s butt isn’t so bad. Truck Driver Burt was not impressed. I didn’t even bother watching Underworld 4. I didn’t like the first one, the second one, or the third one, but Truck Driver Burt has a thing for Kate Beckinsale.
I actually convinced Truck Driver Burt to cut out the tray from that piece of oak. Problem is the oak that we bought is bowed. I had moved the oak and I left it leaning up against my china cabinet. The following conversation took place:
TDB – Baby. Look at this piece of wood.
Me – Yeah? And?
TDB – It’s bowed!
Me – Yeah?
TDB – This is what happens when YOU don’t store wood properly. Just so you know.
Me – HEY! JUST SO YOU KNOW, IT WAS ALSO STORED LIKE THAT IN THE FUCKING STORE! IT WAS ALREADY BOWED WHEN YOU BOUGHT IT BECAUSE YOU HAD YOUR HEAD UP YOUR ASS! YOU WERE TOO BUSY THINKING ABOUT BUYING A TROY BILT MOWER INSTEAD OF PICKING ME OUT A GOOD PIECE OF WOOD! AND, YOU ALREADY HAVE A RIDING MOWER SO DON’T THINK THAT’S EVEN GOING TO HAPPEN. I KNOW WHY YOU WANT IT. IT’S BECAUSE YOU BOUGHT A TROY BILT WEEDEATER, BUT GUESS WHAT? NOT ALL YOUR SHIT NEEDS TO MATCH!
TDB – Um, ok. Just make sure you keep it flat from now on. Ok, baby? Love you.
Me – Love you too.
Evidently, I’m still having mood swings. I also had a freak out when one of the dogs wouldn’t eat dinner last night. I swear I’m not usually this much of an asshat. I just can’t help it. The good news is Truck Driver Burt can usually see them coming now. Most of the time, he gets stiff as a board, his eyes get really big, he puts his hands up, and just keeps repeating woosah to me. Dead serious.
In other news, I also developed a new symptom yesterday. Sore nipples. It feels like I have C-clamps them. – The Infertile Housewife
P.S. – The piece of oak is now laid flat under our heavy dirty clothes hamper. Hopefully, it will straighten out.